YOU PROUD PLAYBOY?

 

Playboy recently went deep, deep inside our “violent hate group” and the story is so chock full of lies, it serves as a good example of the amateur journalism we face on a daily basis. The article was written by a drunk dork named Alex Thomas who calls himself a poet.

We met him at a bar in DC and he began asking us questions. We were very cordial and polite and treated him the way we treat most people, cool. Unfortunately, like all amateur journalists, it looks like he already had the article written in his head and was just looking for moments to fill in the various gaps. According to the narrative, we are a violent hate group that randomly attacks anyone who isn’t “far right.” We do this because we’re lonely and finally found a gang to take us in. Never mind the group he was talking to have been friends since we were kids and many of us were in the military together. Oh yeah, he actually said we were duped by him because he looks tough. Seriously.

When he called us racist, we pointed to the black guy. When he called us homophobic, we pointed to the gay guy. This didn’t effect his argument. He stuck to his thesis and pretended we carried around these poor bastards as some kind of human “get out of jail free” cards. I’ve always been confused by this. If you’re genuinely into getting the story, wouldn’t you want to do it on a self-hating gay who’s in a group that hates him? What about a black guy who hates being black and believes whites are superior? That sounds like much bigger story than pretending a group of close friends are lonely.

Thomas was so determined to prove his story, that he talks about a racist bigot who was wearing a Washington Capitals t-shirt and points out the man, “peppered his conversations with the n-word.” Well, yes, this is technically true. Alex might have thought to include the part where they guy who kept dropping n-bombs was black and grew up in the hood. Has he never met a black person before? That’s how they talk. It’s ironic that his white guilt is what made him conjure up his Nazi narrative and he used a black person to fulfill it. Sounds kinda racist to us.

In the story, he claims we “beat up people who disagree with us.” This is technically true IF the person who disagrees with us attacks us first. We are regularly attacked by antifa and we fight back. That’s not someone violently beating someone just because they disagree, OBVIOUSLY. The notion that we go around randomly beating neocons, vegans, flat earthers, polygamists, and astrologists is just as crazy as it sounds. Who has the time? Antifa does. They regularly “punch Nazis” while simultaneously defining “Nazi” as anyone who isn’t Alt-Left.

Later in the piece, he said he spoke to Gavin’s producer at a party. We know people who were there that night because they were the ones who warned us he was doing a hit piece. Apparently, Alex Thomas was shitfaced at that party and could barely talk. So, he’s paraphrasing conversations he could likely barely remember and treating it like some kind of sit-down interview. This is not exactly Watergate material.

Finally, he mentions one of us being “confused and a bit saddened.” The confused part is true. When you sit down next to someone who tells you to fuck off, it’s confusing because that’s erratic behavior. The takeaway we got from this bizarre exchange was the guy who said fuck off must be mentally ill. However, Thomas needed his incel narrative so he took a large group of friends and said they’re lonely.

We’d like to thank Alex Thomas for creating the perfect example of the unbelievably lazy journalism that haunts us like a ghost.

 

-DC PB

 

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OFFICIAL STATEMENT: We’re Not Going Anywhere