5 Reasons Hunter S. Thompson Would’ve Been a Proud Boy

Dr. Gonzo’s prescription reads: NO WANKS

Hunter S. Thompson—aka Mr. Gonzo, Dr. Gonzo, Raoul Duke—call the man what you will . . . but you’d have to call him a man.

From his love of guns, partying, women, living off the land, undying patriotism, and an utter disdain for establishment elites, he was in every sense of the term: our guy. Hunter was a freelance journalist for magazines like Sports Illustrated and Rolling Stone, and with their recent decline into the depths of liberal insanity there’s no doubt they would’ve turned their backs on him for the very beliefs that made him such a revolutionary figure. With that in mind, here are five reasons Hunter would’ve driven liberals insane by joining the Proud Boys.

1 – GUNS, GUNS, GUNS

Hunter’s love of firearms was never a secret. While the total number of guns he owned is hard to pin down, his farm in Woody Creek Co. contained .44 Magnums, 12-gauge shotguns, black snub-nosed Colt Pythons with beveled cylinders and .22 calibre mounted machine guns, just to name a few. Though the Proud Boys don’t have an official political party, many tend to lean right, which means the 2nd amendment is kind of a big deal. Given the left’s animosity towards law-abiding citizens wanting to own firearms, this would be a big selling point getting Hunter on our side.  

2 – FULL-ON FREEDOM OF SPEECH

As with the 2nd, the 1st amendment is near-and-dear to the hearts of both Hunter and the Proud Boys. While the left claims to be the party of freedom and expression of ideas, a quick peek at Antifa, and the liberal mainstream media’s reluctance to disavow them, is more than enough proof to the contrary. The late Larry Flynt had a great quote about free speech: “Freedom of speech doesn’t protect the speech you like; it protects the speech you hate.” With modern-day political hacks condemning any opposing view as either racist for the left or anti-American for the right, open discourse has never been more important.

3 – DEBAUCHERY

While you may have been hard-pressed to get Hunter to swap out his beloved Wild Turkey for a bottle of Maker’s Mark (the Proud Boys’ whiskey of choice) it wouldn’t have been nearly as difficult to convince him to hop in a convertible and head out to Vegas for a weekend of drinking with the boys. The only problem there would’ve been with having Hunter at WestFest would be trying to keep him from overdosing or tearing a hotel room to pieces. This might’ve been the Proud Boys’ biggest allure for the late great Mr. Thompson—our willingness to tip back a bottle and ride that liquid runaway train into the night.

4 – ANTI-ESTABLISHMENT

“Richard Nixon was a criminally insane monster—Bill Clinton is a black-hearted swine of a friend.” With quotes like these it isn’t a stretch to say Hunter didn’t give a fuck about either party. People who knew Hunter said that he always rooted for the underdog, and the establishment elite are far from that. Given his desire for government to stay the fuck out of people’s lives I’d say that the old guard wouldn’t stand a chance gaining Hunter’s vote. With Gary Johnson embarrassing the Libertarian party on a daily basis in the most recent election, that really only leaves one candidate who could win the “Gonzo” vote.

5 – THE PUNK ROCK PRESIDENT

What do you do if you wanna piss off your teachers, piss off your parents, piss off your friends, be ejected from polite society, and in all other ways be thought of as an untouchable miscreant? Vote for Donald Trump,” said Milo, at Louisiana State University, explaining why supporting Trump is the most punk rock thing you can do.

Johnny Rotten of Sex Pistols fame said Trump was “a political sex pistol,” “a joy to behold,” and even “a possible friend” when interviewed by Piers Morgan on Good Morning Britain. Those limey Brits . . . always a step ahead of us on what is truly counter-cultural.

Trump was a brick in the window of the political elite, which I believe was the driving force to the formation of his base. That’s what a lot of Proud Boys love about him, and what Hunter surely would’ve loved about him as well. If you read Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail, it seemed, at times, that Hunter got more enjoyment out of seeing political normies of the day squirm than he did out of seeing his own candidate gain ground on the increasingly worried elite. Well, what candidate made both parties more uncomfortable in recent memory than The Donald? There are plenty of Google search results out there that would try to convince you how much Hunter would have despised Trump, and in turn, hated the Proud Boys. But just like all the other fake news out there, if you have any knowledge of the subject at hand, their lies become increasingly funny and embarrassing at the same time.

@ProudBoysKansas


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